Seeking counselling takes courage, and it’s natural for many clients to feel apprehensive about the first meeting with the counsellor. Creating a warm and safe physical environment is an essential stepping-stone to building a strong therapeutic alliance. In this chapter guidance is given on setting up the counselling room in a way that helps the client feel comfortable so that they start sharing their concerns. We also provide examples of opening sentences to help break the ice, as well as discussing some other important topics, including building trust and boundary issues such as contracting and terminating sessions on time.

Paying Attention To Meeting, Greeting And Seating

For counselling to be effective, the counsellor needs to work at building a relationship of equals. This is easier said than done, especially in the early stages when the client may be feeling vulnerable and insecure, and bearing in mind that it is usual for the client to meet the counsellor on unfamiliar territory, i.e. the counsellor’s consulting room.

Striving to keep the room neutral, in other words free from personal belongings such as books, ornaments and family photographs, is a positive step that counsellors can take to reduce the equality gap. Barriers such as desks should also be avoided, and chairs should be uniform and placed approximately three to four feet apart, and slightly at an angle.

Being in direct eye contact with the counsellor can leave some clients feeling very uncomfortable or embarrassed. A small clock needs to be positioned where the counsellor can glance at it, and attention should be paid to the lighting, and room temperature. A box of tissues strategically placed where the client can easily reach them is a must, and a vase of fresh flowers or a potted plant can add a touch of warmth and colour to the setting, and reflect something of your personality. With the client’s permission, the counsellor may tape the sessions and this should be set up ready to use.

When meeting a new client, it is also important for the counsellor to pay attention to her own safety. Ensuring that someone else is around and having an alarm button close to hand can help to reduce any anxieties the counsellor might have. However, it should be pointed out that emotional barriers are far more potent that physical ones. Even if all the physical surroundings are perfect, the client still might not feel at ease if the counsellor and client are not in rapport. Figure 6 gives a view of how a counselling room might look.

Greeting The Client

Greeting the client can be fairly informal:

1. Hello Pat, I’m Jan. Please sit down (indicates chair).
2. Hello Paul, my name is William. Please have a seat (indicates chair).
3. Hello Mrs Williams, my name is Jan – what name would you like me to call you by?
4. Hello, my name is William, and yours is?

Addressing clients by their first name can go a long way towards helping them feel comfortable and accepted. And introducing yourself by your first name can help to break down the barriers of unequality. However, do not assume that because you are feel comfortable being on first name terms that all people are. Ask the client how they want you to address them.

Issuing An Open Invitation To Talk

Your opening sentence should be empathic and your posture should demonstrate to the client that you are ready to listen.

For examples of appropriate posture see Figure 11 (page 41).

 

 

Building Trust

Some clients who seek counselling have been badly let down, hurt or abused by other people, and trust may therefore be a major issue. Trust is something that has to be earned by the counsellor and it can be hard work. However, developing the skills of active listening; accurate, sensitive responding; reflecting feelings; empathy; genuineness; and demonstrating that you are fully present for the client can help to establish a solid foundation of trust. Indeed, the more the counsellor invests in the relationship, the stronger the trust and bond grows between client and counsellor.